REID #139

May 30, 2023

SHORT:

Walked into a Succession finale watch party on Sunday and predicted "big musical number" — 45 mins later, Karl came along and delivered with the pipes. God is good :)

MEDIUM:

My world travels continue. This past weekend, Jess and I went to Providence for my five year college reunion. We shared a hotel room with a couple named Korby and Rupert.

Upon arrival, Korby warned us that she is often jolted awake by how loudly Rupert "glug-glugs” water in the night, and to “stay calm if we hear a loud glug-glug.”

I slept peacefully, but when morning broke, I rose to find a graveyard of empty water bottles at the foot of the adjacent bed.

It turns out Rupert did, in fact, “glug-glug in the night”, but he tried to glug as quietly as possible. This was an incredibly considerate gesture. Rupert should definitely go to heaven and not hell if either exist.

Come to my show on 5/31 if you live in NYC!

Tickets here.

LONG:

I turned in my thesis on the Amtrak to Rhode Island (loyal readers who are tired of hearing me complain about it just stripped naked and are running up and down the block screaming “finally!”).

Completing my thesis on the train-ride allowed me to really focus on the reunion weekend and recall beautiful moments like when my college roommate came home late one night when I was dead asleep, turned on all the lights, and said, "I don't understand how you're single, I have hundreds of boys lining up down the block for me" before immediately turning the lights back off and climbing into bed.

The main event of weekend is a big campus dance and the main event for me was seeing this one old guy at the dance in a suit with a bunch of glow sticks around his neck making a beeline for the exit.

^For better or for worse, I think that’s how I live my life. Dressed to the nines while choked by tacky chemical-filled neon accessories, and running for the hills. Somehow… all at once. “I’m here!” and “Get me out of here!”

Anyway… this week’s Snack Of The Week was a delicious chocolate donut I had from Knead Donuts. A close second was the Vegan Gnocchi and Chicken I had from Pianta. I also ate a hash-brown egg & cheese sandwich from Amy’s that was to die for. And shoutout to the 10-year-old and I who both managed to lock ourselves in the bathroom at Like No Udder.

The folks at Plant City are doing some great work too.

Now I’m back in NY eating ice-cold spaghetti at midnight and Googling the musical artists Bibi Gold and Jackal*.

*watching Selling Sunset**

**every time a spray-tanned woman with rock-hard tits and confusing clothes says the word “non-binary” this season I lose my mind… never thought I’d see the day… (and yet, it feels meant to be… after all, I smashed play on the first season of the show while recovering from top surgery…)

C U Next Tuesday