SHORT:
Realizing you’re trans is a lot like realizing you need to poo while on the subway, you’re like — fuckkkkkkk my life — rly? this? now? I wonder how long I can hold it in for…
MEDIUM:
Happy Thanksgiving week. My lover “sponsored a Turkey” named Tai from the vegan sanctuary she’s obsessed with and they sent her a post card with “information” about turkey (and a freaky-ass photo that she wants to hang on the wall of her room… it’s a free country but in these moments, sometimes I wish it wasn’t! <3).
She’s getting her tits cut off tomorrow (my gf, not the turkey). Maybe the part of her that loves weird rescue turkeys from vegan sanctuaries is stored in her boobs and they’ll remove it and then I won’t have to look at pictures of ugly birds called “Loren” or “Tai” all the live long day.
She just said “I love these guys” — and I looked up and she was pointing to her dairy-free ice-cream sandwiches. So now she’s gone heterosexual for ice cream too… lotta changes around here!
LONG:
There r so many trans bills these days... that's why i named myself Reid instead of Bill! — hilarious.
When u go on testosterone, ur c*** turns into a small d***, but I don’t like to think of it like that. Instead, as a Jew, I like to just pretend that the guy who did my circumcision went hog wild/overboard — hilarious.
I wanted to put stupid/silly trans jokes in this newsletter because things are bleak rn for LGBTQs. Lmk if any of it has “helped”.
I also am trying to talk about the weird/intimate parts of medical transition more, even if they’re humiliating or freak people out. Idk. I think knowledge is… power? I’m the first person to ever say that.
Jess and I saw two solo shows this week — Gabe Mollica’s (coming back in Jan at Soho Playhouse, highly recommend!) and Mike Birbiglia’s. I loved both of them. I still have zero idea what I want to do mine about. But I know I want to do it.
I’ve been reading about one-person-show shit online, and everyone’s like “there r only 7 stories” and I’m like hmmm tell that to my 256 daily Instagram ones!!!!
I don’t really have a lot to say. I need to go to bed because Jess’s surgery is at 8am and we have to get there at 6.
I love my gf and I know she loves me but I also know she’d love me more if I was a farm sink with a golden faucet (specifically the one she saw in Stanley Tucci’s recent TikTok video).
I love my weird gay life even tho I’m often embarrassed by it / take it for granted/ get frustrated by it.
Please donate to help trans people who are getting killed and the victims of the Club Q shooting.
Colorado Gives is the official donation site for the survivors and the victims’ families. Please donate if you can to support those affected.
c you next tuesday
Sincerely,
Reid
Venmo: @rpope-venmo-26
Donate to The Audre Lorde Project
Bonus Jonas Zone:
